I'll join you when you feel something

To avoid feeling emotion, many of us become very intellectual; hence the reasonable explanations and advice. But a friend having an emotion needs company. When they get that promotion and are excited, they want to hear – wow, that’s exciting! Right? They want to hear wow, that’s exciting and they want to see that emotion on your face. 

Your friend wants you to look like you just got a promotion too. Any emotion wants company. So if your friend is scared, they want to see that you at least look a bit concerned.

They need to know that you understand, that you get why they are afraid. And most of the time, if you actually allow yourself to get inside their shoes, you can completely get why they feel emotional. I don’t mean that you have to agree with your friend. From your vantage point, you may not see anything to fear from your point of view. Just as it is likely that you didn’t get a promotion at the same time as your friend. But you empathized with her joy then and you can empathize with her fear now.

Take Home Point: All emotions, positive or negative want to be accepted and understood.